


Heathens

by Chuudoku



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Boring legal mumbo jumbo, But seriously that dirty talk though, Dark Humor, Dead people (but no one major), Dirty Talk, M/M, Sexually Frustrated Ignis, mentions of drug use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-28
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-05 17:35:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11018241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chuudoku/pseuds/Chuudoku
Summary: Ignis is a defense attorney tasked with providing legal services for Regis, an infamous yakuza boss, and his son Noctis, who lives a pretty hedonistic lifestyle. Gladiolus is assigned to follow Ignis around and make sure he does his job and doesn't rat them all out to the feds.Ignis really dislikes having to defend criminals. Or so he says. Gladiolus quickly finds Ignis isn't so above it all. Maybe Ignis likes it. A lot.And maybe Ignis likes Gladiolus, too.





	1. The People Vs. Noctis Lucis Caelum & Prompto Argentum

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm trying something different here! More plot-oriented, less overt humor, a bit more serious but still smutty. 
> 
> I did want to leave a comment that this fic will contain descriptions of dead people and drug use; no one major will die, though. I also wanted to say that while I do have some general working knowledge of the criminal justice system, I do not believe in any way that I've actually gotten the law 100% accurate in this fic. So uh, just please do not take legal advise from a smutty Gladnis fic on the internet, okay? If I got anything wrong, let's just pretend this is an AU of an AU where I got it all right. Cool? Cool.

\---

  
As he stepped out of his apartment building into the cool, misty rain, Ignis was reasonably certain that he was not, in fact, going to his death. Well, probably not.

It could be hard to tell. Regis Lucis Caelum often handled things in a rather obtuse fashion. He wouldn't put it past the man to send an SUV at six in the morning to drive him to a remote locale and abruptly bury him six feet under. Regis had done it before, to other people who had displeased or betrayed him ( _if you believed those sorts of rumors_ ). But Ignis, since entering his service four months’ past, had been tight-lipped and obedient, and had taken the substantial money Regis paid him for his legal services without complaint. He was fairly certain he'd done nothing to warrant such treatment.

Still, the car waiting for him at the curb was as ominous as the phone call he'd received. Gladiolus had been exceedingly evasive, simply informing him they needed to  _take a ride_. The pitiful lack of clarity in his current situation made him anxious. The rain didn't help. Neither did the early hour.

The driver opened the door for him as he approached. He hugged his long coat around his suit protectively, took a deep breath, and got into the backseat.

Gladiolus was in the back of the car already, rubbing his face and yawning. He looked like he'd woken not too long ago, which meant whatever this  _emergency_  was, it was as sudden for him as it was for Ignis. He was dressed in his usual tank top and jeans, his elaborate tattoos on full display. Ignis was pretty sure he spied some new ink amongst the designs. Smoke from his cigarette laced through the air, and Ignis found himself wishing he'd thought to bring his own.

"Hey Iggy." Gladiolus said. The car pulled away from the curb, and Ignis took a moment to buckle himself in before he spoke.

"Alright, I’m here. What is going on?"

"I told you. We gotta take a little ride." Gladiolus had the window cranked down an inch, and he turned his head to blow smoke out into the early morning rain.

"That's not much detail to go on. You didn't even tell me if I needed anything."

"Did you bring your phone? Your notepad?"

"Well, yes." Ignis frowned and began cleaning raindrops from his glasses.

"Then that's all you need. Well, that and your stunning command of criminal law." Gladiolus smiled at him wanly. 

"Am I in trouble?" He was fairly certain at this point that wasn't the case, but the ambiguity irritated him. Might as well get this part out of the way, at least.

"No." Gladiolus took a final drag before he flicked the cigarette butt out the window and rolled it back up. "I would've told you if you were treading dangerous territory."

That much was true. Gladiolus had been attached to him once he entered into Regis' service. The tall man followed him often and was present at virtually every interaction he had with anything even  _remotely_ related to the Caelum empire ( _and several that had nothing to do with Regis at all_ ). No one had outright told him what Gladiolus' role was supposed to be, but he could guess: Ignis was an asset, but a newly acquired one, untrusted and with dubious loyalties. Regis would obviously assign someone else as a handler to keep an eye on him and make sure he didn't defect. 

That made Gladiolus dangerous, though. Even with all his friendly charisma and charm ( _and, if Ignis was being honest with himself, animal magnetism_ ), Gladiolus was, for all intents and purposes, his  _warden_ ; there to watch his every move and rat him out at the first misstep. Ignis found himself struggling with how to speak to the man. He knew in the back of his mind that anything he said to Gladiolus, he may as well be saying directly to Regis himself; it was a fact he worked  _hard_  to never lose sight of throughout all their numerous interactions. But Gladiolus treated him with an easy camaraderie, engendering trust and an amicable working relationship ( _among other things_ ). It made every spoken encounter with him a balancing act between friendship and self-preservation. It was also  _exhausting_ , and more and more of late Ignis found himself letting slip information to the other man that he would much prefer remained private.

Best to give Regis as little blackmail material as possible, after all.

"Can you at least tell me where we're going?" Ignis tried another angle.

"We're going to see Noctis." Gladiolus crossed his arms and stared straight ahead, a frown tugging at his lips.

 _Well, that's interesting._  Ignis had met Regis' only son a handful of times before, mostly to settle the latest minor legal dispute the wayward teen had gotten himself into; drug possession issues, a couple drunk driving incidents. The kid was sullen, cold, and often obstinate, and seemed to have a new fling with him each time Ignis saw him. He wondered what Noctis had gotten himself into this time.

"If you're dragging me from my home at six in the morning because he got caught with a joint again I'm going to be  _utterly_ disappointed," Ignis found himself saying. Gladiolus snorted at him.

"Nah, nothing like that this time. Wish it was that simple."

 _Curious_.

 

\---

 

About 15 minutes later they pulled up to hotel that Ignis was, unfortunately, well-acquainted with. Despite its fancy exterior and expensive landscaping, the Red Lion sat close to several strip clubs and bars and was a known hot spot for prostitutes and drug deals. Ignis himself had handled several clients at his firm who had been caught up in escort stings and narcotic busts centered around this place. He was beginning to have a sinking feeling what Noctis might be up to here.

The car stopped at an inconspicuous side entrance. Gladiolus got out first, taking a moment to help Ignis out as well before slamming the door shut.

"He’s on the fourth floor. Room 408. Nyx is already there. C'mon."

Ignis frowned faintly. Nyx was another associate of Gladiolus and Regis whose function had not been fully explained to Ignis at any point thus far. He seemed to spend a lot of his time following Noctis around, however; perhaps he functioned as some sort of bodyguard? 

_Or babysitter._

The elevator ride up was silent. Gladiolus seemed ill at ease, slowly pacing the perimeter as they rode. Ignis had a feeling he would be anxious as well, if only he knew what the  _hell was going on_. He adjusted his leather gloves and sighed, reminding himself to be patient. If Gladiolus didn’t want to tell him up front what was happening, that meant they were planning to just show him instead.

The doors opened, and Gladiolus led him down the hallway. Due to the early hour, the hotel was mostly silent, and the hallway was empty except for one man; Nyx was standing outside room 408, looking positively unsettled. He wordlessly unlocked the door for them, and Gladiolus patted him on the shoulder as they entered.

Room 408 turned out to be an impressively spacious hotel suite. Two queen-sized beds sat flush against the wall on the right, their eggshell white blankets and pillows in complete disarray. Liquor bottles and some leftover pizza boxes were scattered across the floor, along with various bits of trash and discarded pieces of clothing. A pair of expensive-looking leather chairs sat up against the wall opposite the beds. Some skinny blond teen that Ingis was quite sure he'd never seen before occupied one of the chairs, hugging his legs to his torso and chewing on his lower lip. The far wall was taken up by a beautiful bay window. Noctis Lucis Caelum was busily pacing in front of it, smoking a cigarette like there was a time limit on it.

“Well, it looks like you two gentlemen had a much more interesting night than I did,” Ignis commented. His eyes slid over the scene, trying to commit it to memory. While the hotel room was certainly trashed, and there were a few baggies on the dresser with a suspicious white, powdery residue he was about to recommend they flush before checking out of the hotel, nothing else stood out immediately to him as overtly  _illegal_. He wondered what he was doing here. 

He glanced behind him. Nyx had stepped back into the hallway and closed the door behind him. _Standing guard, apparently._ Gladiolus stepped past him towards the beds, glancing at the blond before looking at Noctis.

"Alright, Noct, where's it at?" Gladiolus finally asked.

Noctis looked at the two of them before turning away, sucking hard at his cigarette as he continued to pace. He looked more scared than Ignis could ever remember seeing him, even after the one time he’d wrapped his car around a light pole; his eyes were bloodshot, his hands visibly shaking, and he looked like he’d dressed in a rush.

"Um, there," The blond in the leather chair responded instead, one hand pointing vaguely at the area between the two beds in front of him. Gladiolus moved to stand next the blond, eyes staring at the floor, before leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms.

"Ah, shit," he murmured softly, rubbing his face. Ignis quirked an eyebrow and walked closer, leaning forward to peer around the edge of the bed.

As soon as his eyes landed on the woman on the floor, he knew she was dead. There was no reassuring rise and fall of her chest. She was nude and completely motionless, sprawled out on her back, a syringe lying discarded next to her right arm. Her skin was so pale it had taken on an almost blue tone. Brown, curly hair covered her face in a tangled mess, but even so he could still see the bubbly vomit leaking from her mouth to the carpet.

Ignis abruptly turned his back to the scene, squeezing his eyes shut in a vain attempt to blot out the images from his mind’s eye. His stomach lurched worryingly. He held his breath for a moment until the heaving stopped, willing his body back under his control. His mind fought to compartmentalize, trying to shut down and disconnect his emotions as he did when reviewing photographs from crime scenes in his office. This wasn't a photograph, though; it was real, in front of him, and very, very dead.

“Someone _please_  explain to me," Ignis finally said, once he felt confident he could keep his voice steady, "why there is a dead woman on your hotel room floor."

No one responded. Noctis was staring out the window, like he could will himself out of the room, and the blond’s eyes kept drifting distractedly to the corpse in some sort of sick fascination. 

Ignis pinched his nose for a moment before slowly turning back around. He knelt down next to the body, immensely pleased with himself for wearing gloves. Last thing he needed was his fingerprints at a scene like  _this_. 

He studied the view in front of him. The syringe lying next to her still had a few drops of some brown substance; heroin, probably. Track marks stood out prominently across the pale skin of the woman's inner elbow. While he couldn't feel any heat through his gloves, one touch of her still body told him she'd been dead at least a few hours. Her hair obscured most of her face, but Ignis swore he could see her eyes open, glazed and staring blindly up at the ceiling. An eerie sensation tickled up his spine. He felt nauseous again. 

“Suggestions, Ignis?” Gladiolus asked from his spot against the wall.

“I think Noctis needs to take a few drug abuse classes,” Ignis muttered softly, frowning. He walked back over towards the door until the bed blocked the cadaver from view. “Who’s the blond?”

“Prompto Argentum,” Gladiolus responded, still staring down at the body with a frown. The blond groaned wretchedly at hearing his full name. "He's a... friend of Noctis."

"A friend?" Gladiolus made a rude hand gesture that Ignis took to mean they were sleeping together.  _Alright, so, a boyfriend, of sorts_. “Prompto, get out of that chair and push it over here. I’d like to sit down and I’m not sitting over there.”

The freckled blond stood up and obediently shoved his chair over to where Ignis stood close to the door. Ignis sat down, crossed his right leg over his left, and pulled out his notepad.

“Let’s start at the beginning. What happened?”

Silence. Ignis sighed and rubbed his forehead before glancing at Gladiolus for help.

“Noct, this isn’t a joke,” Gladiolus said softly, leveling a piercing stare at the teen. “You and your skinny-ass boytoy better start feeling chatty or I’m going to fucking wring your _goddamn_ necks."

“I-I don’t  _know_ what happened,” Noctis responded, anxiously, and Ignis filed away the fact that Gladiolus could threaten _Noctis_ into obedience for future reference.

“You’re going have to do better than that.” Ignis pulled out a pen and stared his blank notepad. Even as nerves and adrenaline were making his hand shake, his mind was shifting into auto-pilot, taking note of the scattered trash around the room. He spied a couple of used condoms that hadn’t quite made it into the trashcan. “Who is she?”

“She said her name was Heaven,” Prompto piped up. Without his chair to hide in, he had taken up pacing in a small circle, and Ignis had to bite his tongue to keep from snapping at both teens to sit. Neither of them were helping his nerves. He’d never been tasked with handling a _corpse_ before. Regis better damn well pay him double for this.

“Heaven. And where did you two meet Heaven?”

“Corner of 48th and J,” Noctis muttered, dropping his cigarette in a nearby ashtray before picking up another.

“Is she a prostitute?”

The two teens exchanged guilty looks. Ignis took a breath and adopted a tone usually reserved for small children.

“Did she offer you two sexual services in exchange for monetary compensation?”

“Yes, she’s a hooker,” Noctis muttered around his cigarette. His hands shook as he flicked the lighter. It took him several tries before he got it lit.

“And when did you two pick her up?”

“Around 10, I think?” Prompto pulled out his phone and frowned down at it. “Yeah, I think it was around 10.”

“And then?”

“She, um, had us drive a few blocks so she could meet a guy to buy some stuff.”

“That’s wonderfully vague.” Ignis could feel a headache coming on. “What did she buy?”

Prompto’s eyes drifted to the empty baggies on the dresser. Ignis could connect the dots.

“Cocaine?” He tapped his pen against his notepad, staring down at his notes so far. Despite his hand shaking they were remarkably legible. “So, you picked up a mystery hooker, drove to meet a mystery man, and bought cocaine from him. Is that accurate?”

Noctis sighed out smoke and nodded. Prompto was focused on a fray in the hem of his shirt, tugging loose bits of string and dropping them on the floor.

“Well, that’s a _wonderful_ start.” Ignis didn’t even try to tone back his sarcasm, and Gladiolus snorted in agreement. “Where did you go next?”

“Here.” Noctis hugged himself, cigarette hanging from one hand. “I mean, we stopped and picked up the pizza, and the alcohol, but then we came here.”

“Just the three of you?”

The two teens nodded in unison.  _Three people, alcohol, cocaine, and… pizza. Some party._

“And what did you three do here?” Ignis asked. Noctis and Prompto exchanged another look, which Ignis decided probably meant they were trying to decide if they should lie. “The truth, if you please.”

“We uh, the stuff, and her…” Prompto gestured at the empty baggies and the body on the floor.

“You… snorted cocaine with the hooker?”

“ _Off_  her,” Prompto corrected softly, and Noctis groaned and rubbed his face.

“Off her?”

“You know, off her-” Prompto pointed vaguely to his own behind. Ignis blinked.

“You snorted cocaine off a hooker’s ass,” Ignis said slowly, putting it all together. Gladiolus laughed softly. This felt like Charades from hell.

“It was her idea!” Noctis whined.

“Did you have sex?” Ignis asked, and both teens stared at him uncomfortably. “I’m not trying to be crude, but it’s important that I have the specifics clear.”

“I, uh…” Noctis sighed and spit it out. “Yeah, I did. Then Prompto did. Then she pulled out the needle while we, uh..."

“While you two… had sex?” Ignis ventured, and the two nodded again. “And then?”

“We went to sleep. That was around 1 a.m., I think.” Noctis bit his lip, fingering his cigarette. “Prompto woke up around 5:30 to piss and found her like that on the floor.”

Ignis tapped his pen against his notepad again, frowning as he reread his own notes. The whole thing felt surreal. He considered their options.

“Did you pay her?”

“Huh?” Noctis blinked at him.

“You said she’s a prostitute. Did you guys actually pay her?”

Prompto drifted over to a purse sitting on the floor next to the other leather chair. After a moment of digging around, he extracted a wad of bills that he shoved in his back pocket.

“No?” He said, sounding hopeful.

Ignis rolled his eyes.

"Do we just get rid of the body?" Gladiolus spoke up, shifting where he stood against the wall. Ignis had to admit it was a tempting notion; let the yakuza sneak in and spirit the girl's corpse away and they could all go on and pretend this hadn't happened. _Except..._

“Did anyone see you guys with, uh, Heaven?” Ignis asked.

“Yeah, actually.” Prompto began ticking them off on his fingers. “She was with like three other girls when we picked her up. Then the guy she bought the, uh, the stuff from saw us driving her. And then the manager at the pizza place, the guy working the liquor shop, the hotel empl-“

“I get the idea.” Ignis frowned, looking down at his notebook before sliding it back into his coat and standing up. He crossed his arms and stared at the floor, weighing their options. After a moment, he nodded to himself. "Call it in."

“ _What_?” Noctis’ voice sounded nearly hysterical and Prompto let out a strangled, nervous whine. “Are you saying to call the _police_?”

“Start with calling an ambulance, but yes.”

"Ignis," Gladiolus said softly, his gaze steady. Ignis recognized the tone; it was a warning.  _Dangerous territory_.

“I’m afraid we can’t just dump the body and pretend nothing happened, as tempting a notion as that may be.” Ignis pinched his nose again before pushing his glasses up. “Several people saw them all together. Eventually her friends will report her missing and Noctis and Prompto will be the last ones seen with her, by  _multiple_  witnesses. At that point, it turns into a possible murder inquiry. Without a body, it’ll drag on for months, with lots of interviews, investigation, police scrutiny, and so on. If they _do_ find the body, you’re looking at a whole slew of additional charges; tampering with evidence, improper handling of a corpse, all of this on top of the possible murder charges.” He paused, but Gladiolus hadn’t interrupted him yet, which meant he agreed with Ignis’ analysis so far.

“This,” Ignis continued, gesturing vaguely to the hotel room, the drug use, and the corpse, “isn’t… ideal, no. But technically speaking, finding someone after they’ve overdosed isn’t actually a crime. That means the prostitute, her body, and her drugs all become moot.” He tapped his arm as he mulled the situation over. “That leaves us with just the cocaine to contend with, and possibly a solicitation charge, though I think they’d have a hard time making that stick without an eye witness.” He paused again, eyes flicking over to Noctis and Prompto. “You didn’t actually hand her money out in _public_ , did you?”

The two teens shook their heads. Ignis let out a small sigh a relief.

“So, that would be my _legal_ advice, then. Call it in.”

“What exactly _would_ they tell the police?” Gladiolus asked.

“The truth.” Ignis crossed his arms and met Gladiolus’ gaze. “That the three of them got together for a… ah… _party_. They had sex. After the sex, they went to sleep, and presumably the prostitute shot up and overdosed. They then woke up and found she had passed away.”

“If we’re trying to avoid a solicitation charge, wouldn’t they want to deny the sex?”

“Not at this point.” Ignis nibbled at his thumbnail through his glove as he thought it over. “Even with the condoms, sex is messy. Their DNA will still be all over her. So unless we’re planning to bathe and dry a corpse before calling that ambulance, they’ll have to admit to the intercourse.”

“Ah… no, I’m not touching her.” Noctis piped up by the window, looking faintly green at the notion.

“I thought as much.” Ignis nodded and glanced around the room before looking at Gladiolus once more. “Is there anything I missed?”

“If the D.A. decides to press charges?” Gladiolus was watching him closely, trying to read his face. Ignis got the feeling he was being tested.

“I’ll handle it.”

“You’re sure.”

“I said I’ll handle it.” Ignis met his gaze evenly, doing his best to project calm reassurance. In truth, he was still swimming in adrenaline and about ready to start climbing the walls. Being so close to a cadaver was making him itch. “Even if he does move forward with charges, I’m certain I can plead out to a fine and possibly some court-appointed drug abuse classes.” _Which they should very much take_. “Neither of them will see jailtime.”

Gladiolus fell quiet for a long moment. “It’ll be a scandal.”

“Perhaps. Better a short-lived scandal than a long-term investigation.”

Gladiolus rubbed his face with both hands before sighing. “Alright, Iggy. We’ll do it your way. Call it in, Noct.”

“Fuck.” Noctis’ shoulders sagged in defeat as he picked up his phone. Ignis nodded in satisfaction.

“We need to leave,” he said to Gladiolus as he turned towards the door.

“Wait, you’re _leaving_?” Prompto sounded positively mournful.

“We can’t be here when the authorities arrive. Nothing screams guilt like a suspect calling their _lawyer_ before an ambulance.” Ignis hugged his coat tight and frowned across the room at Noctis. “If I may be so bold as to offer some unsolicited legal advice? Next time, could you consider _not_ picking up a prostitute with track marks and then driving her across half the city for everyone to see?”

Noctis huffed at him and said nothing.

“Let’s go.” Gladiolus touched his back and led him to the door. Ignis took one last look over his shoulder, peering down his nose at the trashed hotel room, the drugs, and the goddamn _dead prostitute_.

“Heathens, the lot of you,” he muttered under his breath.

 

\---

 

“Looks like it made the news,” Gladiolus said in low tones. Ignis glanced up at the TV mounted on the wall of the diner and shrugged.

“Not surprising. Noctis isn’t exactly a nobody, and dead prostitutes always make for good scandal.” Ignis turned back to his coffee, trying focus his mind. Usually the methodic task of preparing his caffeine to his exact preferences was enjoyable. Now though, all he could think about were pale, blue lips and sightless eyes. It made him restless.

“Regis won’t like it.”

“Then perhaps Regis should impress upon his son the importance of keeping his private life discreet, instead of parading it all over the city.” He sipped his coffee before taking his glasses off and rubbing his face.

“You okay, Iggy?” He could feel Gladiolus’ eyes on him. His eyes were _always_ on him. It made his skin feel tight. “You look tired.”

“I’m fine. Just a minor headache,” He muttered as he slid his glasses back on.

“Was it your first time?”

“Pardon?” He blinked up at Gladiolus who stared purposefully back at him. After a moment, his meaning clicked. “Ah, no, not exactly. I’ve… seen them before in photographs during cases in the past. It was the first one in person, though.”

“I’m sorry.” Gladiolus nodded and sipped his coffee, still speaking in low tones. “The first one can be rough.”

“I take it this was not your first?”

“No.” Gladiolus did not elaborate, and Ignis decided to let it go, despite his intense curiosity. Gladiolus did not speak of himself often, even given the wealth of time they spent together. Bits of information like this were precious and rare. Ignis tucked each of them safely away in the mental folder in his mind to be reviewed at a later date ( _alone, in private, sometimes over a glass of fine red wine_ ).

 “What do you have on your schedule after this?” Gladiolus asked after a moment, casually glancing around the diner.

“I actually need to head to the office. I do have other cases to attend to beyond keeping Noctis from being some felon’s new _best friend_.”

Gladiolus seemed to find that funny. “Why not just quit, then?”

“I wasn’t aware that Regis accepted resignations.”

“Not that. The firm.”

Ignis dropped a spoon in his coffee mug before he sat back in the booth and crossed his arms, peering at Gladiolus over the rim of his glasses. “I can’t exactly put this on my resume. I’d be unemployed for years with no explanation. Who would hire me down the road?”

“Why do you need to go anywhere else? Regis pays you pretty well, doesn’t he?”

Ignis felt a frown tugging at his lips. “Yes, but I don’t intend to do this forever.”

“No?” Gladiolus had an odd look in his eye that Ignis couldn’t identify. Mirth, maybe?

“Absolutely not. Keeping you heathens out of jail isn’t exactly my life’s ambition.”

“Then why are you doing it?”

“You don’t know?” That was surprising. Since Gladiolus had been assigned to him, Ignis had assumed the man was fully informed of his situation, probably by Regis himself. He couldn’t quite buy the idea that Gladiolus was in the dark.

“I’ve heard things. I’d rather hear them from you.” Gladiolus continued to watch him while he fingered his coffee mug. _Probably itching for a cigarette._ Ignis found himself wishing he had one himself.

“I-… made a deal with the devil,” he said slowly, sipping at his own coffee.

“That’s a new name for him.” Gladiolus grinned. “What’d you get for it?”

Ignis considered what to say. “Revenge. And a four-year sentence.”

“A _sentence_?” Gladiolus rolled his eyes at him. “Stop being melodramatic. The man does _pay_ you. You’re not a slave.”

Ignis was about to respond when Gladiolus’ phone buzzed on the table. He peered at it.

“What’s it say?” Ignis couldn’t help asking.

“What’ve you got planned tomorrow night?” Gladiolus asked as his eyes skimmed over the message.

“That depends on whether the D.A. moves forward with charges.” Ignis smiled tightly. “If he does, I may have a couple long days ahead.”

“Well, if he doesn’t, keep your night open.”

 

\---

 

He managed to catch Ravus Nox Fleuret alone in his office that afternoon, which was truly a rarity. The man generally had a never-ending parade of lawyers and assistants coming to speak with him. Still, Ignis was thankful for the gift. Their conversation required privacy and delicate maneuvering on his part.

“Scientia,” Ravus muttered when Ignis closed the office door behind him. “I assume you’re here about the Caelum boy.”

“Why would you assume that?” Ignis put on a pleasant smile that was in no way genuine and seated himself in a chair in front of Ravus’ desk, setting his briefcase down next to him.

“You’ve defended him and negotiated on behalf of him, what… five times now?” Ravus skimmed a document in front of him before signing it with a flourish.

“I’m flattered that Mr. Caelum finds my legal services so adequate.” Ignis crossed his legs and folded his hands on his lap. Ravus snorted at him.

“What is this, Ignis? Are you a mob lawyer now? The yakuza have you on speed-dial?” Ravus shoved his paperwork aside and sat back in his desk, eyeing him critically. “If so, you’ve changed.”

“I’m sure I have no idea what you’re referring to.”

“The case is still open, you know.” Ravus picked up a pen and fiddled with it, tapping it against the desk. Ignis fought the urge to tell him to stop. “We _will_ find out what happened to your parents.”

Ignis felt his smile cool several degrees.

“Come to think of it, that happened, what… five months ago? And you started appearing in court on behalf of _Mr. Caelum_ around… four months ago, was it?”

Ignis fought to keep his irritation from his voice. This conversation was really getting away from him. “I’m afraid that’s still a… fresh wound for me, Ravus. I’d really rather not discuss it.”

“Then what _are_ you here to discuss?” Ravus smiled at him a bit too smugly for Ignis’ tastes.

“Cindy is available this evening,” Ignis said gently. Ravus’ smile disappeared. “She wanted to know if you would like to see her.”

Ravus dropped his pen and swallowed hard. Ignis fought his own smug smile.

“What’s the price?”

“Half the usual. Cindy said she’s feeling generous and she misses you.” Ignis casually picked a piece of fuzz from his pant leg and flicked it aside. The look on Ravus’ face told him he’d already won.

“… What time?” The D.A. asked softly. There was a yearning in his voice that made Ignis feel bad. Almost.

“What are you offering?” Ignis stood and wandered over to one of the walls, looking at Ravus’ degrees. He’d graduated near top of his class. Somehow Ignis found that amusing.

Ravus rubbed his face, his voice sounding sad. “You don’t play fair, do you?”

“On the contrary. I believe in finding an arrangement that’s mutually beneficial for all parties involved.” Ignis turned and eyed Ravus, waiting for his answer.

“A stint in a court-approved rehab program and a 30-day jail sentence. _Suspended_ -“ Ravus added, when Ignis opened his mouth to protest, “-so long as the rehab program is completed.”

Ignis mulled it over. “For each of them?”

“Yes.”

“Outpatient?”

“Inpatient. We can’t risk them choosing not to show up or skipping town altogether.”

“ _Outpatient_ ,” Ignis repeated, holding Ravus’ gaze.

“Ignis, come _on_. The kid clearly has issues. He wrapped his car around a light pole doing 65 in a _neighborhood_ with a blood alcohol level of 0.28. He could have killed someone.”

“That has nothing to do with the situation now,” Ignis responded. He crossed his arms. “Outpatient.”

Ravus sighed and rubbed his face again, staring down at his desk. Ignis wondered how far he should push it.

“Outpatient,” Ravus finally consented, frowning. “I’ll get the paperwork sent over first thing tomorrow morning.”

“10 p.m. tonight. Room 517. Cindy is looking forward to seeing you.” Ignis collected his briefcase, smiling down at Ravus. “It’s been a pleasure, as always.”

 

\---

 

He was curled up at home in soft pajamas, halfway through a glass of wine when he got the call he was waiting for that evening.

“Alright, so I have about 36 photos of this dude sucking on Cindy’s titty,” Aranea said when he answered. “Is that all you need?”

“Did you get the-“

“Yeah I got the money shot.” She snickered. “Looked like a fat wad of bills. How much does she _charge_?”

“Enough to make frequent visits a financial hardship.” Ignis sipped at his wine, smiling to himself. “Please have them developed and send them over to my office when you get the time.”

“Sure thing. Who’s this guy again?”

“The current district attorney.”

Aranea’s laugh was tinny over the phone. “What is this, Ignis? Are you planning to blackmail him?”

“Not at present.” He fingered the stem of his wineglass, staring at his carpet. “But it’s good to have options for down the road.”

“You really don’t play fair, do you?”

Hearing it for the second time that day, Ignis was forced to admit to himself that _no_ , he probably didn’t play fair.

 

\---

 

Gladiolus showed up at his apartment door the following evening, as promised. He was dressed well, better than Ignis had seen him in a while; a cream-colored dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up around his forearms and a pair of smooth, dark pants. Ignis stared at him when he answered the door, eyes trailing over the outfit.

“Is this a date?” He finally joked, except it didn’t really feel like a joke. Gladiolus laughed at him.

“I’ve been told to take you somewhere nice.” He looked Ignis over and frowned. “You’re not going out in a suit.”

“What’s wrong with my suit?”

“You’re _always_ in a suit.” Gladiolus rolled his eyes at him. “I know you have other clothes in your wardrobe. Go change. Find something nice.”

And so Ignis found himself in a limo with Gladiolus 20 minutes later, wearing a deep purple dress shirt and dark-wash jeans with a supple leather jacket. And gloves. He always wore gloves when Gladiolus took him anywhere. _Self-preservation, perhaps?_

“Where are we going, exactly?” Ignis asked, as Gladiolus handed him a cigarette.

“I told you; somewhere nice.” Gladiolus lit his cigarette for him before lighting his own.

“Stop being evasive,” Ignis said as he took the first deep drag. For once his nerves weren’t bothering him.

“I’m taking you to Lipsticks,” Gladiolus finally responded, giving him a little smile that made Ignis’ heart speed up until his brain actually processed what Gladiolus had said. Lipsticks was an expensive strip club full of half-nude women that offered lap dances and _more_.

“I’ve been there,” he said slowly, gaze dropping down to the floor of the limo. “I’d really prefer not to go back.”

“What? Why not? They’ve got some really nice ladies.”

“They weren’t to my taste.”

Gladiolus raised an eyebrow at him. “Your standards must be pretty fucking high for them to not be to your taste.”

“Women aren’t to my taste,” he said without thinking. As soon as the words left his lips he cursed himself. Once again, he’d let slip information to Gladiolus that Regis could use to manipulate him. Why did he keep doing this? Gladiolus didn’t even need to get him drunk for his lips to get loose. It was beyond infuriating.

Gladiolus regarded him for a long moment as he sucked on his cigarette. Finally, he sighed the smoke out. “Then we walk across the street to Dipsticks.”

Ignis couldn’t help laughing softly at that. He tried to picture Gladiolus getting a lapdance from some fit man in bikini bottoms. “I… appreciate the offer, but no.”

“No?’ Gladiolus looked mildly disappointed.

“No. I think I’d prefer somewhere… quieter.”

Gladiolus shifted to the opposite booth and opened the divider to whisper something to the driver. The limo abruptly switched lanes and executed what Ignis was positive was an illegal U-turn.

They ended up at small, intimate lounge of sorts. The noise level was low, the music was soft, and the waiters all wore vests and slacks and, _thankfully_ , did not do lap dances. Halfway through his third glass of scotch, Ignis was beginning to wonder if this was a bad idea. While his vision was starting to swim from the alcohol, Gladiolus had matched him drink for drink and yet appeared no worse for wear.

“How did you get the D.A. to agree to just a bit of rehab?” Gladiolus finally asked him.

“You don’t know?” Ignis frowned at him, wishing his eyes would stay in focus. “I just did him a favor.”

“What sort of favor?” Gladiolus had his head propped in his hand, watching him with a soft smile. It made him feel hot.

“I set him up with his favorite whore,” he murmured softly, grinning to himself. He pulled off his gloves and dropped them on the table before opening his jacket. “She’s lactating,” he added, after a moment.

Gladiolus’ eyebrows creeped towards his hairline. He let that go without comment. “You blackmailed him?”

“No.” A pause as Ignis slid out of his jacket. “Not yet, anyway.”

“Fuck, Iggy. What’s a straight-laced defense attorney like you doing blackmailing people?” Gladiolus sipped at his bourbon, and Ignis found himself staring at the other man’s lips wet with alcohol.

“I’m _not_ blackmailing him,” he repeated. He folded his jacket and left it next to him on the booth.

“Sounds like you’re setting him up for it, though.”

“I… maybe,” he conceded. He tilted his cup and watched the ice clink around.

“You don’t have much respect for the law, do you?”

Ignis frowned. _Where the hell did that come from?_ “Of course I do.”

Gladiolus huffed a soft laugh. “How do you figure?”

“Our criminal justice system works under an adversarial model by design,” Ignis said slowly, doing his best to enunciate. Gladiolus’ smirk told him he was doing a poor job of it. “The role of a defense attorney is to provide a zealous defense for his client within the confines of existing law.”

Gladiolus sipped at his bourbon. “Uh huh.”

“And that’s what I do,” he finished.

“You never told me you like men.”

“What?” The abrupt change of topic confused him. He stared at Gladiolus dumbly.

“I mean, I had a hunch, but… four months and you never mentioned it, Iggy.”

“Why do you care?” Ignis frowned down at his mostly empty glass. Gladiolus signaled their waiter for a refill.

“Why do you _think_?”

Ignis thought about it, drunkenly. It took a remarkable amount of effort. He waited until their waiter had set a new glass down in front of each of them before he hazarded a response.

“You… like men, too?”

“I have a taste for both.” Gladiolus sipped his drink and set it down again. “Why do you think I agreed to take this job and follow you around all the damn time? You think I’m interested in the criminal justice system? Legal briefs bore me to tears. But,” Gladiolus grinned wolfishly, “following you around is no great hardship.”

Ignis stared at him. His brain worked hard to keep up, to file all this new information in that mental folder he had in his head. It felt like trying to stuff too many papers in too small a binder. It just didn’t fit.

“You’re flushed,” Gladiolus murmured, head still propped in his hand, those eyes still watching him. His skin felt tight. So did his pants. “Do you want me to take you home?”

 _Yes_.

“I-… have to finish my drink,” he said, lamely. He couldn’t think, not with those eyes on him. His heart was pounding.

“I think you may have had enough,” Gladiolus laughed, but let him drink anyway.

 

\---

 

The ride back to his apartment was surreal, like something out of a fever dream. The tension between them was electric. Ignis half expected Gladiolus to take him right there in the back of the limo, to strip him down and fuck him as they rode back to his apartment. He could picture it so vividly in his mind -the cum running over their fingers onto the expensive cloth seats- that he nearly moaned.

But Gladiolus did nothing so sordid. Instead, he just touched him, trailing fingertips lightly over the back of his hand where it lay on their seat. He stroked his fingers gently, taking the time to rub each knuckle, stroking nonsensical patterns Ignis’ mind couldn’t comprehend but also couldn’t ignore. By the time he reached his pinky, Ignis swore he would soil his pants. He didn’t bother trying to hide out erect he was. Gladiolus knew. Gladiolus could see.

Gladiolus always saw everything. _Damn him_.

The tall man followed him up to the door of his apartment. He fumbled with his keys in the lock, inebriation making him clumsy with depth perception. “Are you coming in?” he finally asked, once the key slid home.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you, sweetheart?”

Ignis frowned at the new nickname, but Gladiolus just laughed. He reached up and traced his fingers over Ignis’ face, thumb caressing his cheek before sliding over his lower lip. Gladiolus’ eyes held his gaze as the thumb pressed between his lips. It felt like a dare. He parted his lips slowly, letting the thumb slide over his tongue before he sucked it gently.

“I’d love to come in,” Gladiolus finally said, as Ignis sucked his thumb lewdly while they stood in the hallway, “but you’re far too drunk to consent, and I’m no rapist.”

Ignis hummed as he curled his tongue around the thumb in his mouth, sucking softly, wishing it was something else.

“You don’t respect the law,” Gladiolus continued in a gentle voice. His tone made it sound like he was whispering sweet nothings. Ignis blinked at him in confusion. Snippets of their earlier conversation came back to him. “You exploit it. You _subvert_ it. And, I dare say, you get off on it.”

Ignis struggled to find something to say, but the thumb stroking his tongue was far too distracting to bother arguing.

“You call us heathens; you sneer down your nose at us, but your tactics are just as underhanded. They’re just in a different arena. You’re a beautiful hypocrite.”

Ignis reached up and dragged Gladiolus’ thumb from his mouth. “Shut up,” he whispered, without any real force. His knees were weak.

“Aw, did I go too far?” Gladiolus was smiling tenderly at him. “Or do you want me to just shut up and fuck you?”

Ignis closed his eyes and moaned.

“You’re drunk,” Gladiolus repeated, his voice barely above a whisper. He slid his thumb over Ignis’ cheek, leaving a trail of saliva. “And I’m no rapist. Trust me; when I take you, you’ll be sober and begging for it. Maybe on that big kitchen table of yours, hmm? How’s that sound?”

He struggled to respond, but the words caught in his throat. Gladiolus leaned in, pressing Ignis against the doorframe, staring at him intently before gently kissing his forehead.

“Say my name when you cum tonight,” he whispered in Ignis ear, breath hot with promise. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” And with that, Gladiolus, the magnificent, beautiful _bastard_ , turned around and walked away.

Ignis stumbled into his apartment and locked the door. He walked to the bathroom, stripping as he went, mind cluttered up with thoughts of Gladiolus as he climbed into the shower. Under the burning hot stream, he stroked himself off, and, obediently ( _perversely_ ), he chanted Gladiolus’ name as he came.

 

\---


	2. The People Vs Cor Leonis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I ended up tweaking the tags on this fic a bit given that the tone of their encounter went to a different place than I was initially planning. That's okay, though. I hope it came out well regardless. Please enjoy!

\---

  
Dry-heaving into a toilet gave one plenty of time to ruminate on the poor life choices one made the previous night, Ignis decided. He laid his forehead on the cool porcelain seat and tried to will his stomach into obedience.

It was horrifying how a few stupid actions in a single evening could have such a large impact on his foreseeable future. He’d let slip so many key points to Gladiolus that should have been kept tightly under lock and key; that he was attracted to men, that he was attracted to _Gladiolus_. He had a dim memory of sucking the man’s thumb and inviting him into his apartment. What had he been thinking? Gladiolus was, effectively, the enemy; someone he needed to keep at arm’s length and be wary of if he wished to survive in this bed he’d made for himself.

But it was exhausting, being so distant. And Gladiolus had been so damned _tempting_ ; the easy-going smile, the hot breath on his cheek, the lips crafting such filthy images in his mind. Ignis couldn’t help but laugh. Gladiolus had talked of his kitchen table, of all places. It seemed a poor spot, given that it sat directly in front of a row of floor-to-ceiling windows.

Or maybe that was the point.

After two more bouts of dry-heaving and some inauthentic promises that he’d _never drink scotch again_ , Ignis finally dragged himself off the tiled bathroom floor and into a much-needed shower. It was there, while massaging vanilla-scented shampoo through his hair, that he decided to nip this in the bud; he would not, under any circumstances, pursue a physical relationship with Gladiolus.

That turned out to be really fucking easy, since over the next two weeks Gladiolus barely spoke to him at all.

 

\---

 

“This isn’t something you’d normally handle,” Gladiolus admitted as they walked through the detention center, “but the usual guys are tied up in another case. Regis seems to have confidence you’ll figure something out.”

Ignis sighed and checked his watch. One in the afternoon. “When was he arrested?”

“Early this morning, around 2 am.”

They were led into an interview room. Gladiolus parked himself in the corner, arms crossed, leaning against the wall. He had kept himself fairly scarce since their _special_ evening out, which had made it easier to pretend it hadn’t happened at all.  That was ultimately impossible, though, if Ignis was being honest with himself; one look at Gladiolus and he could practically feel the thumb in his mouth, the tickle of lips and hot breath whispering hotter promises against his ear.

“Something on your mind?” Gladiolus asked, and Ignis realized he’d been staring.

“No, I just-… haven’t seen much of you lately.”

“Aww. Miss me?” Gladiolus smirked like he always did as he deflected the implied question, and Ignis felt some of the tension between them dissolving.

“Not at all. I’ve appreciated the peace and quiet.” He set his briefcase on the table and sat down, crossing his legs. “Just thought you were perhaps getting a bit lax in your duties.”

“My _duties_ are being performed just fine. I don’t need to be two feet away from you at all times to know what you’re up to.”

“So, you’ve taken to just stalking me at a distance, then?” Ignis laid out a notepad on the table before pulling out the court documents that had been filed so far by the state.

“Would you _like_ me to stalk you? Seems an odd kink but I’m game.”

Ignis opened his mouth to throw back what was assuredly a witty reply when his eyes landed on the name printed on the paper in front of him. A strange bout of vertigo hit him. _Wait, it can’t be him-_

The door opened. Two officers escorted a brown-haired man in handcuffs into the room and sat him roughly in the chair across from Ignis. He looked haggard, like he hadn’t slept the whole night. Ignis was pretty sure he hadn’t; jail cots weren’t exactly luxury accommodations.

“It’s you,” he whispered, after the officers left. The other man kept his gaze carefully blank.

“Wait, you know Cor?” Gladiolus asked from behind him.

“The Immortal, yes.” Ignis responded, cursing himself for his slip. “Only by name, of course. He’s a bit… infamous.”

“You flatter me,” Cor responded with a bland smile. “And you are?”

“Ignis Scientia. I’m a lawyer working for Regis. He’s asked me to handle your case.” He stared down at the paperwork in his hands, trying to get himself under control. Hero worship would only pique Gladiolus’ interest.

“Good luck with that.” Cor sat back in his chair, staring down at the cuffs on his wrists. “They sorta caught me red-handed, as it were.”

“Tell me what happened.” Ignis set the paperwork aside and pulled his notepad close.

“Got pulled over on my way home from a _job_ because of a damn broken taillight.”

“When was this?”

“Around 2 in the morning or so. Officer asked for my license and registration. Took one look at the license and said he recognized my name. Asked me to step out of the car and began searching it.”

“He searched your car over a broken taillight?”

“Seems pretty odd, right? He saw my name and seemed to get a bug up his ass.”

“Interesting. And?”

“And,” Cor sighed, drumming his fingers on the table, “they found blood, brain matter, and a couple teeth.”

Ignis stared at the other man, hand frozen over his notepad. “Come again?”

“As I said. On my way home from a _job_.”

“Ah.” Ignis glanced back at Gladiolus, who smirked wryly at him. “And… to whom would all that belong to?”

“The body they found dumped in the river this morning,” Gladiolus spoke up. “Well, body parts, anyway.”

“Of course,” Ignis said dryly. He dropped his notepad on the table and crossed his arms, frowning at Gladiolus. “I’m not a miracle worker. What exactly is Regis hoping I’ll be able to accomplish here?”

“Whatever you can.” Gladiolus tilted his head, his eyes watching him closely. “Any thoughts?”

“Just one.” He glanced back at Cor. “Why did you have human remains lying around in the open in your car?”

“I didn’t. They were in the trunk.”

Ignis felt his heart skip a beat. “Say that again?”

“They were in a bag in the trunk,” Cor said slowly. “The officer found the bag, saw the blood, and arrested me.”

Ignis felt an odd sense of giddiness bubbling up in his chest at the possible out. “And he gave no other pretense, besides recognizing your name? He didn’t say he smelled drugs or anything?”

Cor cocked his head. “No, nothing.”

“What’re you thinking?” Gladiolus asked, and Ignis felt himself smiling.

“I’m thinking,” he murmured softly, grinning up at Gladiolus, “that I need to ask for a probable cause hearing.”

 

\---

 

Gladiolus didn’t even bother hiding his surprise when Noctis flopped down next to him on the courtroom bench. “The hell you doing here, princess?”

“Shut it.” Noctis flipped him a rude hand gesture which only made Gladiolus grin. “Dad said I should come. Said maybe I’d _learn something_.” He was dressed maybe a bit too casually for a courtroom, in jeans and a t-shirt, with a pair of reflective sunglasses hiding his eyes from sight. As Gladiolus watched him, Noctis slid the sunglasses off to rub at his eyes. They were bloodshot.

“Withdrawal’s a bitch, ain’t it?” Gladiolus finally mused, crossing his arms.

“Seriously, Gladio, _shut it_.” Noctis jammed the sunglasses back into place, frowning as he looked around the room at the various people in attendance. “Who are all these people? They’re not all here for Cor’s trial, right?”

“This isn’t a trial,” Prompto said as he settled down on Noctis’ other side. “Just a probable cause hearing.”

“The hell does that mean?”

“It means,” Prompto drawled, sliding an arm around Noctis’ shoulders and massaging the back of his neck, “that Ignis is asking the state to show a judge that they have enough evidence to proceed with charges.”

“I thought it was pretty cut and dry,” Noctis murmured. His head dropped forward to give Prompto better access to the base of his skull.

“Iggy’s not a miracle worker, but he can occasionally perform magic tricks.” Gladiolus mused with a sense of pride; as Ignis’ handler, any successes the man had naturally reflected well on him. Ignis had done pretty damn well so far in that department. Gladiolus was pretty sure some of the other guys were jealous _they_ hadn’t been assigned to the attractive lawyer who actually did his damn job with no fuss.

“Magic tricks?” Noctis raised his eyebrows at him curiously, but the sharp clap of the gavel interrupted his question.

“Just watch,” Gladiolus murmured, as court came in session.

 

\---

 

“And what happened when you pulled the car over?” Ravus asked. His tone was entirely too smug for Gladiolus’ tastes, like a man going through the motions when he knew he had already won.

“I asked the man for his license and registration, which he provided. At that point, I recognized his name from a previous case and realized he was a hitman.”

“ _Allegedly_ ,” Ignis piped up cheerfully from his table next to an emotionless Cor. He flashed a polite smile at the judge, which she returned in kind.

“An _alleged_ hitman,” the officer corrected from the witness stand. “I then asked him to step out of his vehicle while I searched it.”

“Did you find anything?” Ravus folded his hands behind his back as he addressed the officer.

“Yes, I found human remains.”

“Can you be more specific?”

“Blood, some substance that I later found out was brain matter, and some teeth that appeared human.”

“What did you do at this point?”

“I placed Mr. Leonis under arrest and called for backup.”

“Thank you.” Ravus glanced at Ignis, shrugging. “Your witness.”

Ignis finished jotting some notes on his notepad before he rose to his feet, smoothing his jacket down. He was wearing his very best battle armor; a dark, form-fitting suit that Gladiolus knew was custom-made. The glasses he wore completed the look of a well-prepared, studious defense attorney ready to go to war. _Or_ , Gladiolus mused, _a sexy lawyer ready to get bent over a_ -

“Officer, when you searched my client’s car, what were you looking for?” Ignis asked casually.

“I’m sorry?”

“You indicated that once you realized who this man was, that you asked him to step out of the car so you could search it. What were you looking for? Did you think he had drugs?”

“No, sir.” The officer shifted slightly in his chair. Gladiolus could tell from the hard set of his jaw that was surprisingly nervous. Perhaps he sensed the coming trap.

“Not drugs. Contraband, then? Weapons, possibly some other illegal substances?”

“He’s a hit- an _alleged_ hitman. Not a smuggler.”

“So, you were looking for a body, then? Or evidence of one?”

“Which I found,” the officer pointed out.

“Indeed. And where exactly did you find it?” Ignis had taken up pacing in front of his table much like Ravus had done.

A beat. “In the trunk,” the officer said, hesitantly.

“Ah, the trunk. Unfortunately, that’s the part of this I’m afraid I’m having a bit of a problem with.” Ignis stopped then and stared at the officer. “What exactly was your reason for going _into_ the trunk?”

“Mr. Scientia,” the judge spoke up, propping her head in one hand, “where are you going with this?”

“Plain view clauses stipulate that anything sitting out in the open in the car would be fair game, but the interior of the trunk would not be covered under this. Therefore, some sort of warrant or probable cause would be required to open the trunk.” Ignis crossed his arms and gave him a brief smile to the officer. “No warrant existed. We’ve already established that you didn’t believe the man had drugs or any sort of contraband. So, what was your cause for going into the trunk?”

“Your honor,” Ravus began, standing up behind his desk. The judge held up her hand to silence him.

“It seems to me the search of the trunk was _illegal_. Any evidence obtained during the illegal search would therefore be labeled ‘fruit of the poisonous tree,’ as it were, and struck from the record.” Ignis leaned against his table and waited for the murmuring in the audience to die down.

“You’ve got to be kidd-“ Ravus sounded exasperated. “Your honor, he cut up a man and shoved his body parts into a _bag_. He dumped the parts in the river. We still haven’t even found the right leg.”

“Mr. Fleuret,” the judge cut him off, frowning down at him from her bench, “Do you have any evidence tying this defendant to the crime beyond what was found in the trunk of his car?”

Ravus sat down heavily behind his table. “No,” he conceded after a moment, glaring across the room at Ignis.

The judge drummed her fingers for a moment before standing up. “A five-minute recess, please.” She grabbed some paperwork and stormed off to her chambers.

 

\---

 

Ignis sat down slowly besides Cor, acutely aware of the other man’s eyes on him. “Is this actually going to work?” Cor murmured.

“The legal argument is sound,” Ignis responded. “It seems the judge is loath to let you go on a technicality, but if it goes forward anyway it’s likely to be overturned on appeal.”

“Seriously?” He tapped his finger on the table. “So, this could just… go away? Like magic?”

“That’s the idea.” Ignis peered around the courtroom. He spied Gladiolus seated a few rows back, with Noctis and Prompto at his side. That was a surprise; he didn’t think Noctis had any interest in criminal law. As if on cue, Noctis abruptly blew a kiss across the room, and Prompto wiggled his fingers in a light wave. Ignis followed their line of sight to a slender, pretty blonde seated in a bench just behind Ravus’ table. The blonde blushed and waved shyly back at them. Ignis frowned.

“Who are they waving at?” Cor asked softly.

“Ravus’ baby sister,” Ignis muttered in exasperation.

 

\---

 

“Given that the search was _illegal_ , the evidence obtained from that search is therefore suppressed. With no other evidence tying this defendant to the crime, the charges against him are hereby dismissed. The defendant is free to go.”

With a final sharp clap of the gavel, the courtroom erupted in conversation. Ignis grabbed his paperwork and carefully filed it away in his briefcase. Adrenaline was still coursing through his veins, making him giddy with excitement. Somehow, he’d managed to pull a rabbit out of a hat. He hoped Regis would be pleased.

“Holy shit, Iggy,” Gladiolus murmured as he approached the table. “It actually worked.”

“Have the car detailed, please.” He snapped his briefcase shut and met Gladiolus’ gaze with a frown. “Or, maybe just burn it.”

Cor bowed his head in acknowledgement. “We’ll get it taken care of.”

 Ignis practically ran from the courtroom after that. He needed to be alone. The heady mix of victory and praise was almost sexual in nature, making him feel euphoric. Ignis had never been one to partake in the sort of merrymaking that Noctis preferred, with his stimulants and depressants. This sort of natural high he got from beating the system seemed just as good.

_Wait. Beating the system?_

Ignis frowned the whole taxi ride to his office, both at the curious thoughts running in his head and at the wholly inappropriate erection he seemed to have. Perhaps Gladiolus hadn’t been so far off the mark.

 

\---

 

He approached his office, his body mostly under his control once more, only to find a man waiting for him.

“Can I help you?” Ignis asked out of reflex. The man was tall and wore a long, black overcoat and sharp leather gloves that Ignis couldn’t help but admire. Auburn locks spilled out from under a fedora. The man had a casual air to him that Ignis found oddly off-putting.

“Are you Ignis?” The man tapped the glass on the office door where Ignis’ name was printed.

“I am. Are you looking for a lawyer? I’m afraid I’m not really looking to take on new clients at the moment. I’ve got a lot on my plate already.” He pulled out his key and unlocked the door, letting the man follow him in.

“Oh no, I’m not looking to hire you. Just hoping to talk.” The man smiled at him affably. Something about the phrase set off warning bells in the back of Ignis’ mind, making the hairs on the back of his neck prickle.

“Can I ask your name?” He said carefully, as he set his briefcase down next to his desk. The man plopped himself lazily in the chair in front of him and beamed at him.

“Of course. How rude of me not to say it up front. My name is Ardyn Izunia.” He held out a business card. Ignis took it and read it over, trying not to let any emotion bleed onto his face.

The man was a federal agent.

“How can I help you?” Ignis slowly sat down behind his desk, card still in hand.

“Well, Ignis- I can call you Ignis, right?”

“If you like.” Ignis crossed his arms and waited impatiently.

“Much appreciated, Ignis. It seems you’ve picked up some _interesting_ acquaintances lately, and I was hoping to have a bit of a chat with you about that.” Ardyn grinned cheerily.

“I know a lot of people. Could you be more specific?”

“Oh, come now,” Ardyn said, the grin still artificially glued to his face. “I’m sure you know who we’re talking about.”

“I’d appreciate more clarity, if you don’t mind.”

“Regis Lucis Caelum,” Ardyn leaned in and whispered, like it was a secret. He then chuckled and sat back. “The guy is kinda scary, isn’t he?”

Ignis blinked slowly. Was this man quite sane? “He has retained my services for a handful of small legal matters. As I’m sure you can appreciate, any correspondence we had regarding those would fall under attorney-client privilege. It would be improper of me to reveal anything.”

“Of course, of course.” Ardyn nodded agreeably. “But if you had knowledge of any _ongoing_ illegal activity, or any _forthcoming_ illegal activity, you would be obliged to reveal that, yes?”

“Of course.” Ignis smiled faintly, fingering the card he still held. _Where is this going?_

“I was _also_ hoping to speak to you about your parents. Nasty bit of business that was. You weren’t yet working for, ah, Mr. Caelum when that took place, right?”

Ignis let that question stand for a moment as he struggled to get his emotions in check. “I’m not clear how the death of my parents would be a matter of federal inquiry.”

“Oh, but it _is_ , Ignis!” Ardyn leaned forward again, grinning brightly at him. It made Ignis’ skin crawl. “You should understand by now that just about _anything_ related to Mr. Caelum is a ‘matter of federal inquiry,’ as you so charmingly put it.”

“They died in a house fire. It was an accident.”

“Was it?”

Ignis smiled blandly at the other man. “It was. Now. I’m very sorry to rush you but I’m afraid I’m quite busy at the moment. Could we maybe speak another time?”

“Oh of course, Ignis. I’m sorry to just turn up unannounced at your door.” Ardyn pointed at the card Ignis still held. “You give me a call and let me know when would be a better time for us to have our little chat, yes?”

“Absolutely.”

“Take care now!” Ardyn tipped his hat to him before disappearing out the office door.

Ignis sat back in his chair, turning the card over and over in his fingers, weighing his options. As a relatively new addition to Regis’ assets, they were clearly hoping he would turn informant and disclose what he knew in exchange for immunity. Still, the federal government had been trying to pin anything on Regis for years and had continued to fail. If they were trying to exert pressure to turn Ignis, it meant they were grasping at straws.

His phone buzzed, breaking him from his thoughts. He shoved the card into the front pocket of his briefcase. _A problem for another time._ He picked up his phone and glanced at the name displayed on the screen. _Gladiolus_.

“Yes?”

“Jeez, Iggy, so cold. Figured you’d be busy jerking yourself off in celebration or something.”

Ignis barked out a laugh. “Nothing so sordid. You’ve quite the imagination.” An envelope left on his desk caught his eye. Someone had scrawled his name across the front in black marker. He flipped it over and pried the clasp open.

Gladiolus _tsked_ at him. “Maybe my imagination had some help.”

“Is that right? What sort of help?” He tilted the envelope and a handful of photographs spilled out into his hands, showing District Attorney Ravus Nox Fleuret giving money to a known prostitute before nursing at her chest. He admired the clarity of them. Aranea never failed to disappoint.

“You’re so cute when you’re being evasive, sweetheart.”

Ignis felt his heart skip a beat at the ridiculous nickname. Gladiolus knew just how to play him. “Are you taking me out again?”

“If you want. Was also thinking we could just celebrate at your place.” Gladiolus infused the words with so many deliciously erotic undertones that Ignis felt himself stirring in his pants. His resolve to _absolutely not_ go down this path with Gladiolus was beginning to crumble after only a scant few weeks.

“Alright,” he agreed after a moment, sliding the photographs back into their folder. “My place it is.”

“I’ll bring wine.”

 

\---

 

Gladiolus didn’t exactly skimp when he bought wine, Ignis found. He whistled softly as he popped the cork out of the bottle. “How much did this set you back?”

“Don’t worry about it.” The taller man dumped his coat on Ignis’ couch before wandering into the kitchen. He perched on one of the stools next to the island to watch him. “You should check your bank account tomorrow.”

“Why’s that?” Ignis fetched two wine glasses from his cabinet and poured them each a glass.

“Regis was duly impressed by your magic trick. Wants to show his appreciation.”

“Yes, well, please make sure he knows not to expect those sorts of results every time.” Ignis took a sip of the wine, practically purring at the smooth flavor. “We got lucky. The police were incredibly sloppy. Probably a rookie officer who got ahead of himself. If it hadn’t been for that, Cor would be looking at a very lengthy jail term.”

“Well. Amen to small miracles then, hmm?” Gladiolus raised his glass to him before taking his own drink. “So how long does it take you to get drunk on wine?”

Ignis snorted into his glass. “More than one glass, at least.”

“So, better tolerance for wine than scotch?” Gladiolus asked lightly, a knowing little smirk playing on his lips.

Heat bled into his cheeks. “About that…” Ignis fingered the stem of his glass, staring at the counter as he fought to control his nerves. “It would be better if we maintained a professional relationship, no?”

Gladiolus started at him, his smile turning confused. “Wait, what? Why?”

“Why?” Ignis tried to keep his tone light. Gladiolus didn’t deserve his frustration, sexual or otherwise. “Because I’d really rather my sex life remain private from Regis, at the very least.”

“Me, too. Who’s gonna tell him?”

“You are, obviously.” Ignis drained the last of his glass before pouring himself another.

Gladiolus snorted. “That’s news to me.”

“Come, now. I’m not stupid. Your entire job here is to inform on me to Regis. Are you trying to tell me you wouldn’t include my sex life?”

“Fuck, Iggy.” Gladiolus laughed at him softly. He polished off the rest of his glass and held it out for a refill. “You want to know what I tell Regis?”

“I think I have an idea.” Ignis refilled the other man’s glass, eyes firmly focused on his task and pointedly _not_ on Gladiolus.

“Not really. You’re pretty far off the mark, to be honest.” The taller man reached out and caught his wrist. “Iggy, look at me.”

Setting the bottle down, Ignis slid the wine glass back over to Gladiolus before finally meeting his gaze. The expression on the taller man’s face seemed to be shifting between amused and concerned.

“Here’s how it works. Once a week he calls me. We chat about what my dad’s up to, or what stupid shit Noctis has gotten himself into recently. He asks me how you’re doing; good, bad, stressed, whatever. I tell him. He asks me if there’s anything we should be concerned about; you got too much on your plate, any signs that you might be on the verge of ratting us out. I tell him no. He gives me an idea of what to expect over the next few days, if anything. Then we say our goodbyes and hang up.” Gladiolus stopped then, taking a long drink from his glass. “That’s it. Your sex life isn’t exactly front-page news.”

Ignis frowned. “But-“

“You think Regis needs blackmail material or some shit? Come on, Iggy. We both know Regis already has enough dirt on you as-is to ensure mutual destruction if need be. He’s not really worried whose dick you’re sucking.”

His cheeks grew hot again. Maybe it was the wine. “Why wouldn’t you tell him?”

“Because. I don’t make it a habit of telling Regis about _my_ sex life.” Gladiolus grinned at him, undressing him with his eyes. “Besides. Part of knowing what you’re up to requires a certain level of trust _from_ you. I’m not going to get that trust if you think I’m going to rat out every tiny slip to the man in charge.”

Ignis didn’t bother mentioning that he had already thought that. “So you’re saying…”

“I’m saying the secret of whose dick your sucking is safe with me.” Wine forgotten, Gladiolus stalked slowly towards him until he’d pinned him against the kitchen counter. “Especially if it’s mine.”

The kiss was sudden and yet somehow entirely expected. Gladiolus kissed in an altogether dominating way, tongue invading his mouth like there was a time limit on it. Blindly, Ignis groped behind him to set his wine glass down before grabbing weakly at Gladiolus’ shirt. The other man began to grind against him; short, eager movements that served only to drive his arousal higher.

When they broke for air, Gladiolus tangled fingers in his hair and pulled his head to the side, exposing his neck. Wet kisses trailed over his skin, making him whine in the back of his throat.

“Don’t you dare leave a mark,” Ignis huffed, and Gladiolus laughed darkly before sinking his teeth into the soft flesh at the at the juncture of neck and shoulder. Pain laced outward, quickly followed by hot, heady pleasure that made him suck at his teeth.

“Been dreaming about this for months,” Gladiolus groaned into his skin, licking the mark he’d left before pulling back to smirk at him.

“Months?” Ignis parroted back, hands sliding eagerly over Gladiolus’ chest before palming him between the legs. “You have more self-control than I would have expected.”

“Time to see if the reality lives up to the fantasy.” Gladiolus slid hands over Ignis’ shoulders before pressing down, down, until Ignis found himself on his knees in his own kitchen. He watched, almost deliriously excited, as Gladiolus undid his pants, shoving both jeans and underwear to mid-thigh before stroking his cock slowly.

Ignis sized it up. He was big, bigger than he might have expected, yet Ignis was confident he had a toy or two of a similar girth. It’d be a stretch, but no more than he’d had in the past. The real surprise was the bits of metal that caught the kitchen light; two small beads, one at the tip and a second just under the ridge of the head. He stared at the piercing, licking his lips in anticipation before peering up at Gladiolus.

“Really? A piercing?”

“You like it.” Gladiolus smirked down at him, sliding the bead at the tip over his lips. “Don’t even act like you don’t.”

Ignis closed his eyes and moaned softly, tongue darting out to lick the head before he knocked Gladiolus’ hand away to wrap his own around the base. He gave it a few slow, gentle strokes before lapping at the tip. Gladiolus buried his fingers in his hair again, his other hand braced against the kitchen counter, watching him with dark, lustful eyes. _Always watching._ Ignis took the head in his mouth, tongue swirling around the tip, earning a soft groan for his efforts.

“You like sucking my dick?” Gladiolus cooed down at him as Ignis bobbed his head up and down the length. He whined in response, trying to convey both _fuck yes_ and _you taste so good_ in a single sound. He wasn’t sure if he succeeded, but Gladiolus’ fingers tightened in his hair anyway, his hips beginning to move in time with Ignis to fuck his mouth. The metal bead kept bumping the back of his throat, making him gag, but that only seemed to spur the taller man on.

Gladiolus gripped the back of Ignis’ head, holding him steady as he pushed in deep. Ignis sucked in breath through his nose and held it. He felt the metal kiss the back of his throat, pushing almost impossibly deep into the soft tissue. Tears welled up in the corners of his eyes and he swallowed repeatedly around the head, holding Gladiolus’ hips close, nose buried in the trimmed hair around the base of his cock. Each swallow around the sensitive tip wrenched a satisfied groan from Gladiolus, making Ignis’ own length jump in response.

Eventually the burning in his lungs took its toll. He pushed on Gladiolus’ hips and the man obediently withdrew, leaving him gasping and struggling to swallow the mix of saliva and precum left behind.

“Shit, Iggy,” Gladiolus groaned, stroking his cock as he watched him catch his breath, “You could quit being a lawyer and just go suck dick for a living.”

Ignis whimpered and nuzzled Gladiolus’ cock, leaving wet, messy kisses along the length. His lips brushed Gladiolus’ fingers and he sucked on them, peering up at Gladiolus through teary lashes.

“Oh _fuck_ ,” Gladiolus hissed. He grabbed him and hauled him to his feet, nearly shoving him out of the kitchen. Ignis tried to steer Gladiolus down the hall but the taller man was having none of it. He found himself being guided over to his dining room table.

“You’re not serious,” he panted, raising an eyebrow.

“I said the kitchen table, didn’t I?” Gladiolus flashed him a wicked grin. “Strip.”

Normally he would have continued to protest, but arousal and wine mixed together in his mind to leave him feeling light-headed and shockingly submissive. He obediently unbuttoned his shirt while Gladiolus tore into his pants with all the enthusiasm of a child on Christmas. Ignis kicked his pants off when they fell to his ankles. Once his shirt was fully unbuttoned, he rolled his shoulders to slide it off, but Gladiolus caught the fabric before it could fall.

“Leave it on,” he said hoarsely, before turning him around and bending him over his own kitchen table.

The wood was cold against his skin, making him shiver. He tried not to hump the table as he stared out the window in mortification. The blinds weren’t exactly closed entirely, and bits of illumination from cars and street lights peeked through.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart,” Gladiolus chuckled a bit breathlessly behind him. “I’m sure no one’s looking.”

“I _have_ a bed, you know.”

“Yes, but this is _so_ much more fun.” Ignis heard a bottle cap pop open. He craned his head to peer back over his shoulder, eyes widening as he was greeted to the sight of Gladiolus lubing up his own cock. He squirted a bit more lube on his fingers before tossing the bottle carelessly onto the table. A second later, Ignis felt fingers sliding over his hole, teasing the muscles while smearing the lube onto the skin. He waited for the traditional preparation ( _one finger, two finger, three finger, cock_ ) but instead Gladiolus pulled his fingers away. A moment later, he felt the hard tip of Gladiolus’ cock against his tight, puckered entrance.

“Wait, you’re not gonna-“

“You prefer it without, don’t you?” The knowing tone in Gladiolus’ voice made Ignis flush with equal parts humiliation and delight.

“H-how would you know?”

Gladiolus laughed breathlessly. “We can talk about it later,” he murmured as he pressed forward.

The lubricant did its job. Ignis felt himself stretch impossibly wide as Gladiolus sank into his body. White-hot pain laced through his veins, wrenching a loud, unbidden cry from his lips. He dropped his forehead against the table, trembling, his leaking, throbbing cock betraying his pleasure.

“ _Goddamn_ , Iggy,” Gladiolus groaned as he bottomed out inside him. He felt so full, so deliriously high on pain and lust that he couldn’t think straight. His fingers shook as he gripped at the table, dripping sweat and precum across the surface. Gladiolus held mostly still to give him time to adjust, but after a few moments he began to move; shallow thrusts at first, easing them into it, making sure Ignis could take what he had to offer.

“ _Gladio_ ,” he gasped weakly, since, pinned between his handler and his kitchen table, he could do nothing else. Gladiolus gripped his hip tightly with one hand. His other grabbed Ignis’ hair and wrenched his head back, forcing him to arch his spine.

“You take my cock so good,” Gladiolus hissed in his ear as he began to fuck him in earnest.  The sharp staccato of skin against skin filled the room, mixing with the cacophony of moans and curses coming from both of them. Ignis braced himself against the table as best he could. Euphoria coursed through his veins with each pounding heartbeat, making him dizzy.

“Gladio, _please_ ,” he cried out, not even sure what he was asking for. Gladiolus pushed him back down on the table, grabbing his hips with both hands to drag him back onto each deep, punishing thrust. The taller man’s breathing was already getting ragged, and Ignis sensed the end was very, very close.

“Iggy, your ass is goddamn _perfect_.” Fingers dug deep into his hips, holding him still as Gladiolus drove into him hard. A handful of thrusts later, Gladiolus groaned, and Ignis could feel cum squirting inside him, so incredibly hot and deliciously slick. He shivered, resting his forehead on the table as he fought to catch his breath. Eventually the cock inside him stilled. Gladiolus pressed kisses to his back before he withdrew.

“Gladio, _please_ ,” he gasped again, trembling.

“Of course.” The world spun as Gladiolus flipped him over, stroking his hands down Ignis’ chest before ducking his head and swallowing his cock.

It was pure _bliss_. Ignis’ hips bucked off the table as Gladiolus suckled his neglected cock. His orgasm came swiftly, washing over him in a euphoric, heady rush. His cum shot down Gladiolus’ throat, the relief so immense it brought tears to his own eyes.

Ignis didn’t exactly black out, but he could tell a few moments had passed before he came fully back to himself.  He blinked down the length of his body, staring at Gladiolus leaving butterfly kisses over his chest. He could feel the other man’s release leaking sluggishly from his body to drip messily on the tiled floor.

“You trashed my kitchen,” he finally murmured, lamely. Gladiolus laughed at him.

“I’ll help you clean it up tomorrow. Deal?”

He nodded wordlessly, and Gladiolus scooped him up to carry him off to bed.

 

\---

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry but pierced!Gladio is essentially now my head cannon. He might just pop up in all my fics. D:


End file.
